To be really free, we must become dependent.

To the world, that is an oxymoron. To Christians, it is the path to joy.

The more dependent we are on Christ, the freer we are. Complete freedom requires total dependence on God.

Dependence, even in this world, isn’t necessarily easy. With my eye trouble, I’ve become much more dependent. My husband has been doing all the driving. Meals in assisted living came on their schedule. Worse, much worse, morning coffee came on their schedule!

Set Free for Dependence

We are set free for dependence on God.

Spiritually, for the child of God, we are set free from slavery to sin at the same moment we become dependent on Christ. Some call this our “Dependence Day.”

“For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death.” (Romans 8:2)

“If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” (John 8:31–32)

We are saved from the penalty of sin, once-and-for-all, when we receive Christ as Lord and Savior.

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” (John 3:16)

But we are saved from the power of sin gradually over our lifetimes as we learn, more and more, to relinquish every area of our lives to our Lord.

“For you … are Light in the Lord; walk as children of Light (for the fruit of the Light consists in all goodness and righteousness and truth), trying to learn what is pleasing to the Lord.” (Ephesians 5:8–10)

“Work out your salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure.” (Philippians 2:12–13)

Test

Here is a penetrating test (drawn from the Navigators):

List every area of your life, in whatever detail seems useful to you. For example:

1. Spiritual
2. Bible study
3. Prayer
4. Family
5. Work or school
6. Recreation
7. Finances
8. Health
9. Nutrition
10. Exercise

Then, ask yourself these questions about each area:

1. Am I willing to give this area to the Lord to do whatever He wants? And then praise Him for what He does?
2. Am I willing to do (or not do) whatever He wants in this area?

Joy

“Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:13)

An overloaded airplane will not fly.

When a truck is overloaded, its springs break.

When heavy snow builds up on bushes, the branches break.

When we have too many obligations, when we try to do too many things, we might cope successfully for a period of time, but, long-term, we break.

Implications of Overload

When we are overloaded, we’re less apt to consider our ways. It’s harder to listen. We’re more likely to be angry. We are likely to snap at interruptions, refuse new opportunities, and crumble with crises.

When I was working, day after day, week after week, there would be little or no “white space,” times on my calendar without an obligation. Without sufficient time to reflect, I was less effective, and I misinterpreted opportunities as avoidable interruptions.

Many of us, whether or not we’re working, live our entire lives that way, with long to-do lists, and constant pressure. We schedule our lives from dawn to bedtime, sleep coming long after sunset. Our families suffer. Our health suffers. We’re emotionally depleted. When (not if) we’re confronted with unexpected opportunities or crises, we can come apart.

We might be like a juggler who can comfortably handle 5 balls, but who drops all of them when a sixth ball is thrown to him.

On the other hand

Jesus never told someone He didn’t have time.

He never seemed to be in a hurry.

Jesus’ life was full of interruptions that were opportunities to explain God’s kingdom, to call for repentance, to demonstrate the Father. (See Interruption or Opportunity?) He responded, in the moment, to whatever the Father sent Him.

He had the disciples come away to rest. (Mark 6: 31)

How can we be more like Jesus?

Margin; Breathing Room; White Space

It is vital that we have sufficient unscheduled time. Some call this “margin,” others call it “breathing room,” or “white space.”

With margin, we are more apt to be spontaneous, welcome opportunities, have strength for crises.

Having margin is not sloth. It is actually a tool to increase our effectiveness.

Creating Margin

One of my lessons in retirement is that there is still more to do than there is time. Prioritization is still required. I still have to say “No,” to some good things in order to have time and energy for the best things.

And I am newly conscious of the need to leave ample unplanned time, “white space” for rest, the unexpected call, or the unforeseen crisis. We need emotional and physical energy in reserve to do our best.

Overloading ourselves is not an effective long-term strategy.

Instead, overload makes us poor and needy.

After taking several time management courses, I decided I would not take another unless they guaranteed I would have 25 hours in a day.

Here’s how bad it was: When I was working, my favorite day of the year was the day we switched from daylight savings to standard time. That day, and only that day, had 25 hours. Just one hour made a big difference to me. Sad. Sick. Silly.

Jesus’ Time Managment

Jesus never prayed for 25 hours per day. He was busy, but we never get the sense He hurried. He seemed to take as long as necessary with whoever He was with or whatever He was doing.

Here is one busy Sabbath for Jesus: He taught in the synagogue at Capernaum. In the synagogue, He cleansed a demon-possessed man. He left the synagogue, entered Simon’s house and healed Simon’s mother-in-law. “Now when the sun was setting, all those who had any who were sick with various diseases brought them to Him, and He laid His hands on every one of them and healed them.” Luke 4:31-41.

“And when it was day, He departed and went into a desolate place” (Luke 4:42).

In His last week: “And every day He was teaching in the temple, but at night He went out and lodged on the Mount called Olivet. And early in the morning all the people came to Him in the temple to hear Him” (Luke 21:37-38).

Jesus knew why He had been sent (for example: Luke 4:42-43; Luke 9:21-22; Luke 18:31-33), but didn’t plan out His days in 15 minute blocks.

He did the Father’s work as it came. He initiated some interactions, but generally people came to Him, “He welcomed them and He spoke to them of the kingdom of God and cured those who had need of healing” (Luke 9:11).

Jesus did not do everything He could have done. He did not heal everyone. He didn’t travel the world. He didn’t write a book. But Jesus completed the work the Father had given Him to do. (John 17:4)

Implications for Us

When we become clear about our purpose, it becomes easier to make the most of our time. (Ephesians 5:15-16, Colossians 4:5.)

When we know the work the Father prepared for us (Ephesians 2:10), it becomes easier to discern which interruptions are opportunities and which would take us off course.

Jesus spent many hours in prayer. The days I pray about my “to-do” list, in fact, make my “to-do” list a prayer list, the list often gets shorter, and the days better.

One item that should always be on our “to-do” lists, even for those who don’t prepare “to-do” lists, is to be available to our Lord. We should never be slaves to our plans, but servants to God.

We always should remember there isn’t ever enough time to do everything we might like to do, even for a retiree, but there is always enough time to do what God wants.

Remember, God is not on our schedules. Let’s be on His.

Are you stuck?

Most of us have gotten stuck in the past at one time or another; sometimes for long periods of time.

Unfortunately, the past is a very unproductive place to be: it steals opportunity and joy. By affecting today, it diminishes tomorrow as well. It is essential to move on.

But how? Here are some tips from someone who also has been stuck:

Forgive what needs to be forgiven.

Forgiveness is for you. It is in your own best self-interest. Hard? Yes it can be. But forgiving is essential. In instructing the disciples how to pray, Jesus said: “And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” Jesus said that if “you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive you.” Later, He told a parable that concludes if we don’t forgive from our hearts, the Father will turn us over to the torturers.

But sometimes knowing you need to forgive isn’t enough. The memory of something horrible, something unfair, something hurtful may stymie you.

The key is to choose to forgive even if you don’t feel like it. This is an act of the will. It is a choice. It is not a feeling. God is gracious and often gives us the feelings later. But initially it is a choice which you, in fact, can make. Don’t confuse “can’t” with “won’t.” You can. The question is whether you will.

Here are a few things that might help. Reframe things by separating the person from what the person did. The person who hurt you is a flawed human being. S/he was damaged in some way. What they did had everything to do with the hurt person they were and, perhaps, little or even nothing to do with you. Their intention might have been different than their impact. Remember we are all sinners; we are all living in a fallen world.

Once, when I was stuck and hadn’t yet forgiven the person, I heard the Lord say to me: “If not now, when?” Good question. If you haven’t yet forgiven someone, but know you need to, if you don’t do it now, when will you? I urge you to forgive now and start healing.

Confess what needs to be confessed.

One definition of maturity is that we know which stuff to own. Sometimes adults blame themselves for hurt done to them when they were young children, when it was really solely the problem of the person doing the hurting. The horrible tales of child abuse and neglect, for example, do not require confession on the part of the child, but do require the now-adult to forgive.

However, for hurts later in life, there is usually some contribution by the hurt party, even if it was just denial or failure to confront.

Almost always for those stuck in the past, regardless of how old we were when it happened, there is a need to confess lack of forgiveness. So—back to Step 1

Learn what can be learned.

 This step goes along with, but is different than, Step 2. Capturing lessons gives us the opportunity to not only grow and mature ourselves, but gives us the ability to help others in similar spots. It helps us do things differently the next time. It helps bring goodness out of bad.

Forget what lies behind and press forward to what lies ahead.

Paul called himself the chief of sinners. He persecuted, and participated in murder. And yet he was the author of much of the New Testament. He started churches. He preached and exhorted. He is seen as a spiritual giant. He told the Philippians about one thing he did: “…forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3: 13b-14)

Someone told a wonderful story about a mistake made by a nephew and how the nephew agonized about what he had done: “If only I hadn’t done that…” The uncle knew his nephew was on the road to healing when the nephew said: “Next time, I’ll…” Monitor your thinking. Are you saying “if only” or are you saying “next time?” “If only” is focused on the past, on regrets, and indicates you’re stuck. “Next time” indicates you have learned from the event and are moving on.

Do your best to forgive. Do your best to understand, confess and learn from how you might have contributed to the situation (and do your best not to take blame that isn’t yours to own). Then move on. Move forward. Train yourself to forget what lies behind and press forward to what lies ahead.

And repeat!

The first four steps are usually not a one-time deal. The deeper the hurt, the more likely all four steps will need to be repeated. That’s okay. The second cycle reveals important information you didn’t have the first time; things you’d forgotten; hurts you couldn’t face the first time; new thoughts about how you might have contributed.

The clue for when to repeat these four steps is when you start thinking more about past events or when resentment or anger resurfaces. Or, sometimes, when you become aware you’ve lost your joy.

The retinal surgeon made three holes in my eye, and cut out most of the inside of the eyeball. This is making me better?!

Any surgery makes a hole in the body where there is not supposed to be a hole. This is supposed to make the patient whole?

Yet, in order to become well, surgery may be necessary. Surgery is an example of making it worse to make it better.

Trials, for the Christian, are another example. We experience trials and suffering, which make life worse, but are promised that those very trials and suffering make us better.

We are promised that trials and suffering:

1. Produce endurance, leading to character, and character to hope (Romans 5:3-4)
2. Produce steadfastness (James 1:2)
3. Result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ (1 Peter 1:6-7)

We are to:

1. Rejoice in our sufferings, anticipating the good to follow (Romans 5:3)
2. Count trials all joy, knowing the good results we’ll see (James 1:2)
3. Rejoice, knowing we’ll experience joy at the coming of Christ (1 Peter 1:6)

In order to rejoice during trials and suffering, to count trials all joy, to agree to surgery, we must take the long view. The benefits of surgery are expected to outweigh the risks.

Children of God are promised unimaginable joy. That long view is a sure thing.

Rejoice.

Also see Joy in the Journey, How to Get Through It, and What’s So Good about Bad?

My dad was in the Navy in WWII. When he sailed under the Golden Gate Bridge, heading to war, he said he was relieved to start what must be finished.

In order to finish anything, we must start. We must have our goal in mind, and we must get on with it. If we’re scared, we must do it scared. (See Do it Scared.)

My goal is to hear my Lord say to me: “Well done.” I certainly do better, day by day, when I keep that goal in mind.

Jesus set his face to go to Jerusalem (Luke 9:51), knowing He would suffer and be crucified. But He kept on, day by day, and died so that we might live.

My first eye surgery is this next Wednesday. Yes, I’m apprehensive, even with lots of prayer. But I know retinal surgery is the path to improved vision, or, at least, the path to maintain the vision I still have. Delay worsens my condition.

The Lord God helps me; therefore I have set my face like flint. (Isaiah 50:7) So I am eager to begin what must be finished.

Is there something you must start in order to reach your goal? What are you going to do about it?

This was a hard post to write.

I believe in Jesus Christ, the risen Son of God, and trust Him, and Him alone, to save me and give me eternal life.

My vision is poor due to retinal conditions in both eyes that require surgery. I cannot, by myself, correct my vision. Only God can heal me, and He may use physicians and medicine in the process. I am praying for guidance in selecting the “right” doctor, and will pray for his or her skill and wisdom in treating me. I am praying God restores my vision.

I love God and know He loves me. He is sovereign and I believe whatever happens to my eyesight will be used by Him to make me more into the image of Christ, and to equip me to serve Him.

The Temptation

God’s answer to my prayer for restored vision might be “Yes, now,” “Yes, later,” or “No.” As God’s child I need to submit to Him and be grateful for His answer.But I am still praying for the “Yes, now” answer.

Here is the temptation. My sin, our sin, Eve’s sin, is to want to be like God, to be self-reliant, to be large and in charge.

Do I look to my faith? Or to God, in whom I have faith? Do I need to work myself up to confidence/faith in the outcome I want? If I focus on my faith instead of my God, I am looking to myself.

Do I look to my prayers? Or to God who answers prayers? If I look to my prayers, I might worry about whether my prayers are fervent enough, or eloquent enough, or frequent enough. Would I increase my chances of restored vision if I enlist others to pray for me? Lots of people? Should I seek out prayer chains? Is there safety in numbers? I might worry whether I am on the “right” prayer chain, or whether enough people are praying for me. Or whether the “right” people are praying for me.

My faith doesn’t save me. Jesus Christ saves me. My prayers won’t, in themselves, result in improved vision. My sovereign, loving God determines my vision.

Looking to my faith or my prayers is a reflection of deep-set sin, wanting to be like God and looking to myself for the answers.

Submission

Do I want God’s best for me? Or do I want restored vision? I want both. But what if God’s best for me is not restored vision? Or worse?

Am I willing to consistently pray for restored vision, but end my prayer as Jesus did in the Garden of Gethsemane, saying, “Yet not my will, but Yours be done.”

The cynical side of me says I might as well since I am totally out of control anyway.

But as a child of God, I want to please my loving Father, who wants the best for me. I want a humble faith.

Father, I am totally dependent on You. I intellectually know that whatever happens will bring good in my life, both now and for eternity. You know I long for restored vision. Help me want, even more, whatever You want for me. Please help me pray, and mean it, “not my will, but Yours be done.”